talvin: (Default)
[personal profile] talvin
Please write a book for the juvenile audience--an anthology would be nice--and make it about Princesses.

Please put down the rotten fruit and listen for a minute, OK?!

I want a subversive book about Princesses, please. After all, what is a Princess? A Princess is (usually) the daughter of a monarch, be they King, Queen, Emperor, Empress, or sometimes just a higher order of Prince/Princess. Nothing else is required to be a Princess.

Unless you buy into the pop-culture marketing craze, which tells us that to be a Princess:
1) You have to have perfect hair and body;
2) You really want a guy to come rescue you (don't worry: if he's not already a Prince, Daddy will make him one--or Disney will);
3) He will probably know it is time to rescue you because you are screaming;
4) You more than likely have passive-aggressive issues with other females in your life (wicked stepmothers are a staple, but sisters get in on the act, too);
5) Pink, and other pastels;
6) You will pose for a very pretty portrait with your perfect hair and body and beautiful pink dress, and copies of this portrait will appear on little girls' underwear. Please do not ask me who is going to be admiring your picture: some things don't hold up well when thought about rationally.

So, Dear Authors, take all that...and shovel it over the side. A Princess is the daughter of the Monarch. Keep only that. Get subversive. Little girls are told that they should be Princesses, so show them what a Princess can be. I know I am asking a lot: I am proposing no more and no less than a Palace Coup.

Not all Princesses are that bad, mind. My daughter has had all the Disney Princesses shoved at her by well-meaning people, including a pile of the Royal Portrait Panties. The only one she seems to have latched onto is Merida from Brave: the Princess who is Armed, Dangerous, and has Less-Than-Perfect-Hair. (In other words, just like my kid.) The less said about the recent makeover, the better.

Oh, and Editors: if you do manage to put such an Anthology together, see if you can get Robin McKinley involved. An excerpt from The Hero and the Crown would work nicely. "Well, Dad, while you were gone I went out and killed the Dragon." Perfect.

If you can't beat them, join them and undermine them from within!

Date: 2013-05-31 03:24 am (UTC)
cellio: (Default)
From: [personal profile] cellio
This isn't for young adults. This is for you: Peter David's take on Disney princesses.


talvin: (Default)

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